FRIENDSHIP is one of the most valuable aspects of human life.
Good friends are not simply people we share time with; they are those who help to shape our character, beliefs and worldview.
As philosopher Aristotle once wrote: “Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.”
To be a good friend requires more than casual companionship.
It involves effort, consistency and a genuine commitment to another person’s growth and well-being.
In this article, we will reflect on some of the traits we can embody in order to be a good friend.
One of the key elements of friendship is learning to compliment effort and not just the outcome.
Praising a friend only when they succeed may lead to unnecessary pressure, while acknowledging the work they put in builds genuine confidence.
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By appreciating a friend’s dedication and persistence, we encourage them to value their own input rather than relying solely on external results.
Friendships also have the ability to transform how we see the world.
The relationships we form shape our values, beliefs and even our perspective on life.
Through friends, we are exposed to new experiences, cultures and ways of thinking.
American essayist, lecturer, philosopher, minister, abolitionist and poet Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: “A friend is one before whom I may think aloud.”
This openness not only enriches our worldview, but also helps us to grow in self-understanding.
At the same time, we must recognise common barriers in forming close bonds.
One such barrier is the “liking gap”, the tendency to underestimate how much others enjoy our company.
Another is the “acceptance prophecy”, where believing someone values our presence actually increases the likelihood that they will.
By understanding these psychological truths, we can approach our friendships with more confidence and less self-doubt.
Consistency is another cornerstone of strong friendships.
Relationships cannot thrive on occasional check-ins; they require steady communication and genuine closeness.
As popular American journalist and author Edna Buchanan wisely put it: “Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.”
Like family, friendships flourish when nurtured with regular attention and care.
Inevitably, friendships will encounter challenges.
Misunderstandings and rifts are part of human relationships, but how we handle them defines our character as friends.
A good friend approaches conflict with patience, honesty, and the willingness to reconcile.
This often means showing vulnerability and admitting when we are wrong.
American academic and podcaster Brené Brown reminds us that: “Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it’s having the courage to show up when you can’t control the outcome.”
True friends understand that weakness shared is not weakness at all, it is a doorway to deeper trust.
Beyond sharing joy, a good friend is someone who genuinely cares about our sorrows.
They reassure us in times of uncertainty and support us through challenges.
Listening attentively without judgement is one of the simplest yet most profound gifts we can give.
As 13th-century poet Rumi beautifully expressed: “Be a lamp or a lifeboat or a ladder. Help someone’s soul to heal.”
Offering support in tough times oftentimes strengthens our friendships.
Finally, respect for boundaries is essential.
Every individual has limits and honouring those limits shows maturity and empathy.
Friendship is not about constant closeness but about mutual respect and trust, even in distance.
To be a good friend requires more than companionship, it is a balance of encouragement, consistency, vulnerability, respect and support.
Good friends are those who uplift us, challenge us and stand by us through joy and hardship alike.
German-French theologian, organist, musicologist, writer, humanitarian, philosopher and physician Albert Schweitzer once wrote: “In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.”
Being that kind of person for someone else is the essence of true friendship.
