Many marriages have collapsed and families have been affected because of lack of unity. We need to understand that what goes on in a marriage is what goes on in the family.
Marriage is the foundation of the family. When marriages are sick, the family gets sick. If we want to fix the family in this generation, we ought to first fix the relationship that founded that family. Marriage is the foundation and unity was supposed to be the core or cornerstone of the foundation.
The first human relationship God created was Marriage. (Genesis 1, 2). To create nations that would steward His creation, God made humans, male and female and brought them together in marriage and said: “For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and be joined to his wife and they shall become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24.
There are three processes in this verse, but I am interested in the last two: Leave and cleave (be joined). These underline the unity that must be in a marriage.
Coming out of the protective custody of your parents and joining with your wife so you could become one flesh. One flesh is the final product or destiny of marriage and it must be accomplished through unity that the world cannot explain. In that unity, the couple must achieve the mandate of God for every marriage.
“Be fruitful and multiply and fill the whole earth and subdue it; and have dominion over the fish of the sea the birds of the air, and over every living creature that moves upon the earth.” Genesis 1:26. Not to take away anything from your theology, this benediction, or blessing, or mandate, is pronounced by God upon a couple.
They are to do this in unity. Remember that marriage in unity or one flesh is to continuously manifest the unity in the godhead family, the Father, the son and the Holy Spirit. The other reason why we are created in the image and likeness of the godhead is to carry and perpetuate this divine unity and marriage is the chosen human relationship where divinity could be enjoyed and magnified in humanity.
God in His threesome is a united entity and He expects us in marriage to be as united so we could bring about His nature and enjoy His blessing. The enemy envied the unity in marriage and then sought to destroy it.
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Remember that at the fall, after the devil had interfered with this divine unity in marriage, husband and wife started blaming each other and they could no longer carry out the assignment of God. From then on marriages and families began to suffer. Everything went wrong in marriage in Eden and Jesus arrived in a family to fix it up so we could return to the original benediction.
The divine intention for husband and wife was monogamy. In this state, together they would form an inseparable union through which they would enjoy the blessing of the Lord. When the enemy steals unity in your marriage, he has tempered with the flow of the blessing in it. He has tempered with the core of your marriage.
Where there is unity God grants a blessing and life forever more. If you want the blessing of the Lord in your marriage, work on unity with your spouse.
It is a tedious process uniting two minds, wills and emotions and yet this is the centre of the unity needed. Physically, you are under one roof and sharing a bed and seemingly united. But unity goes deeper than this. The unity that unlocks the blessing and brings to pass the mandate of God is when you are of one accord, united in mind, and emotions, united in purpose and in everything you are doing. Many couples are pulling apart in their souls and spirit realms.
They sleep together, but go different directions. They never agree on anything. In fact, they never consult each other. They do as they please. Whatever they attempt does not succeed.
This is exactly what the enemy wants to see. When we operate like this our marriages are never fruitful and our families suffer serious and ungodly lack.
You see marriage is exposed when there is no unity of purpose. One flesh is the God-desired level of unity in marriage, where two people become one. This calls for dying unto self and sacrificing a lot of our so- called rights to become that which God wants us to be in marriage.
Remember, your marriage is an earthly manifestation of the image and likeness of God and the divine unity of the godhead. Marriage is a God thing.
Maybe you are asking how you could possibly accomplish such unity in your marriage. We will answer this question next week. For now work on the unity. You can have a fresh start if you want.
Kilton Moyo is a pastor, counsellor and author of The Sex Trap. You can call or WhatsApp on +263 775 337 207 or +263 772 610 103.