HomeOpinion & AnalysisColumnistsThrough the eyes of a 7-year-old

Through the eyes of a 7-year-old


LET me tell you a funny story! I got busy one day and didn’t have time to check my seven-year-old daughter’s homework. The next morning, I was checking it and realised she wrote God down for every answer! I mean every single answer!

Obviously not happy, I called out, “Abi! You told me you did your homework! You lied! You did not even try to do your homework!” She sweetly and calmly said, “well, it was you who told me God is the answer to every problem!”
haha! I knew I should not laugh because she hadn’t put any effort into her schoolwork, but I couldn’t help it! Lazy student, but smart child! If you watched our television show on children, you can probably picture Abi saying this because she had the entire audience in stitches laughing so loud with her witty comments. If you missed that episode, you can download it off our website www.ashleythaba.com.

Abi’s answers were wrong on her homework but if she really gets that lesson and begins to understand that God really is the answer to life’s problems, she will succeed in life. Many of you are aware of the TV show my husband and I have produced.

We have been humbled and grateful to hear how the show is helping you personally, so please keep the feedback coming! After working so hard for so long on something, it is so rewarding to hear about lives being changed for the better. But, one question keeps coming up as people give their thoughts on the show. How are you still happily married after 16 years?

I should start sending Abi to tell them because I am starting to feel like a parrot repeating over and over — it is all God! I know that sounds like pious rhetoric but it is the truth.

Percy and I have found tremendous guidance for the daily principles of our marriage in following God’s word. Let me share a few reasons why in this article, but you can get the full story by watching our episode titled “Spirituality in marriage” from the website www.ashleythaba.com.

We are each individually at peace. I can’t stress enough how huge this is. I am not looking to him to make me happy. Of course, he makes me happy! But I don’t depend on his actions or lack thereof to feel an internal sense of joy.

Having a personal relationship with my Creator where He fills me with His Holy Spirit and is a voice behind me each and every day whispering love, guidance, and promises into my heart brings me immense joy.

The great thing about this joy is that it isn’t dependent on circumstances — meaning even if Percy and I have a fight, deep inside I never feel lost, ignored, or abandoned. I have direction. I have a friend who will never leave me nor forsake me. He was before time began and will be until the day I die and still until eternity. I can depend on God every day of my life to walk with me through whatever trials life throws. That brings me joy and peace and allows me not to put unnecessary pressure on Percy to meet an internal need in me he will never meet.
My husband and I are individually secure. We both truly believe that we are sinners who are in and of ourselves failing at life when we do things our way. That admittance and acceptance of our shortcomings has actually formed a great base to us both individually finding security that we are wise in following God’s guidance and not our own. This means we both meet on the same pages of the Bible to find our security and direction for how to make decisions which determine our daily paths.

In summary, we are healthy individually, which allows us to come together and be healthy as a couple. This in turn allows us to parent our children from a state of peace, joy, and faithfulness towards one another — again creating an overall healthy family. We know it might sound cliché, but truly we encourage people to get right with your Creator. When that relationship with your heavenly Father is secure and thriving, you will be surprised to see many other relationships become much healthier because He will change you from within. As you become healthier internally, you are able to have healthier happier relationships externally with others around you.

For more practical tips which are guaranteed to enhance your relationship with your partner, our marriage book is available in electronic copy on our website, www.ashleythaba.com. We have written it because we believe strong relationships make for strong people. When you are in love and feel secure and happy in your relationship, we believe you will be a happier more productive member of society in general. We hope you can download the book and begin to grow today.

Ashley Thaba is a life-coach, team-building facilitator and motivational speaker. She is also the author of Conquering the Giants and Dive In.

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