Living together in doses


Guest Column Nothando Bhila

UNDENIABLY, many a time people are of the view that it is impossible to converse, interact or live together peacefully with everyone, especially those people we may view as being difficult or different in a way we may not be in agreement with. I believe it is absolutely possible so long as we love to lead peaceful lives.

At times, the impossibility judgment can be so drastic. Individuals may even vow never to speak to each other again. In some instances, it can be a phase, but in others it may go on for years on end, with both or all parties showing no remorse whatsoever on the actions being taken.

If we take it upon ourselves to ‘pursue’ peace with one another, we will realise that it is very possible to live peacefully with everyone.

“No one is born hating another person because of the colour of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn
to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.” (Nelson Mandela: Long Walk To Freedom).

We surely can be taught to love and ultimately live peacefully as one people. Yes, you are probably saying in your mind that there are some extremely difficult
people out there who cannot be tolerated, but I say, surely, we can be able to take such people in doses.

There is so many types of medication in the universe that may be used within the medical fraternity. Each has its own use and should be taken as per the
prescription given and as per the ailment needing redress. In as much as the medication may be good for you, there is a certain dosage allocated and for a
certain period of time until perhaps that condition subsides.

There is medication that some people may react to, while others don’t. For others, the same harmful medication may works wonders and with no side effects at

It is this reflection that perhaps shows how each person has his or her own purpose in the world and how perhaps in their own right are an actor playing out a
scene peculiar to them and of use in one way or another.

It is well if it is a state of affairs where high dosages are recommendable with a particular people or person as this means relations are made easier, but it
is in doing the difficult or impossible things in this life that heroes are born and remembered when they are gone because of the examples they set to us all
and the legacy they leave behind.

Of interest to note is the fact that in as much as every medication has its own dosage taken for a certain period of time, an excess can cause toxicity and the opposite may cause the desirable results not being reached and possibly detrimental effects.

The reflection for me in such instances is to take such people through non-harmful doses where toxicity symptoms are foreseen and perhaps retreat after
reaching the recommended amount to maintain peace and to later take more doses of them at a later time or should need be as some interactions can be seasonal.

If truth be told, they may never accept the way in which you see things, but that does not mean we should hate them for not being able to accept other people’s attitudes.

This, for me, helps eliminate strife among relations and reduces the amount of antagonism among people. It does, of course, take a lot of effort and a firm
decision to “pursue” peace with everyone as I mentioned earlier on and lead a life with less strained relations.

Hatred and intolerance have also been known to fuel extremism and terrorism due to lack of tolerance.

Seeking the understanding of different people also comes in handy, meaning knowledge and wisdom have to be sought about them before determining the
recommendable doses that will continually promote peaceful living together.