Last week, we looked at hospitality as one of the qualities of healthy and stable families.
By KILTON MOYO
We want to look at least at four of these qualities, so that we can challenge each other as we build or rebuild our families. I am confident that you will agree with me that every building is as strong as its foundations.
The family is the foundation of every nation or society. It is the foundation of all human relationships and, as such, there is need for us to have this foundation fortified, so as to stand against the storms of this life and continue to live to expectations.
I think it is our duty, as families, to build good characteristics, so that our families can produce people, who have direction and who can have an impact in their communities.
I want to submit to you that one great way of fighting corruption is building or supporting the family structure, so it can be able to groom people.
Courts alone can only send them to jail and not end corruption.
If the family that produces or manufactures humans continues to feed society with thugs, this means there will be no end to corruption no matter how much we arrest each other.
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To me, investing in sound families is a strategy that gives us long term and generational benefits. It also gives us eternal benefits.
Compassion
Human relationships are built on compassion. Compassion is a cluster of several feelings, thoughts and actions such as empathy, sympathy, understanding, care, concern, tender-heartedness and others.
It is built on the biblical principle of bearing one another’s burdens.
The Bible says in Galatians 6: 2 that when you do so, you are fulfilling the law of Christ.
When you are compassionate, you will accept one another’s past pains and failures and embrace and move forward, rather than fight over these.
Many families are yet to learn how to be compassionate with one another.
You see, families fight and finish each other over issues that they ought to discuss and put aside, forgive and move on. Where there is no compassion, there are grudges, unforgiveness, conflict and divisions.
My take is that the family is where people must learn to forgive and embrace each other.
It is a place where people must learn how to relate with each other and other people elsewhere.
Everything that makes human life interesting must be learnt at home and if the home is not modelling it, then society is in trouble.
Barriers to compassion
There is always a temptation to keep our sorrows to ourselves. A family with people who cannot share their pains and feelings with other members is bound to walk in serious selfishness.
What is the point of having a family when you cannot share your inner struggles?
A family is there so they can help you bear your struggles. There is also this temptation to take our eyes off the suffering of other family members. Have you not heard people say it is “not my businesses”?
You can never say that about your family if you are sane and a family builder.
Strong families share their struggles and pains. Strong families stand together In the face of adversity.
Do not be that person, who offers solutions, rather than offering sympathy. I think it starts with love, beloved.
The duty of a family member is to love before anything else. Love cares and has actions that show it.
I have heard or seen some family people, who take away their love when they disapprove of something done by their own.
Disapproval must not take away love. Love in the family is unconditional. That is compassion. How can we build compassion at home?
It starts with each individual. Be compassionate to yourself. Love yourself. I am not suggesting pride here.
I am talking about you accepting yourself, praising yourself, forgiving yourself and doing all that is good to you.
The Bible encourages us to love our neighbours as we love ourselves. Many of us have not yet learnt how to love.
When you are able to love, only then can you give yourself to others. We give to others that which we have, love.
Learn to communicate well as a family. Do not shout or insult or scold and mock, but communicate in love. Your communication must bring correction and encouragement.
Compassionate families encourage each other. When the world discourages you, you run home and there, you will dream again.
It is so sad that many people find encouragement in the world and find mockery at home. That is not the purpose of family, beloved.
Family shows loving kindness. They touch each other with love and give each other life. They stand for each other.
Because of lack of compassion in the family, we see a high rise in the number of children living on the streets, gangsters and desertions.
Well, I pray that we will take time to build compassion in our families. Live in love and give love to one to another as families. Remember this is your season. God bless your family today.
You are free to follow us on our Facebook, Twitter and blogs for more information and ideas. You can also invite us to your seminars or attend our seminars. We desire being a blessing to the family in the continent. You can also get our books from our online store at www.kiltonmoyoinspirations.com.
Kilton Moyo is creator of Fruitful Marriages, a renewal and enrichment programme and is pastor, counsellor and author of Marriage Fitness. Call or whatsap on +263 775 337 207, +263 772 610 103 [email protected].
