Enough of chancers, clowns and confusionists

By The Zimbabwe Independent and The Standard | Jul. 21, 2017 | 4 Min read

People have every right to be sceptical and suspicious of these former Zanu PF functionaries now professing to be in the opposition ranks. Is it not a dangerous and potentially suicidal political gamble to embrace them with less than a year to go before the 2018 general elections? Is this not the time to close ranks and go for broke, chauya chauya, come what may?

It’s not quiet on the political front in Zimbabwe.

echoes: CONWAY TUTANI

What with down-and-out former Zanu PF stalwart Didymus Mutasa going back, with his tail firmly between his legs, to President Robert Mugabe’s gravy train? Who is next because next there will be?

And if you are in the opposition, it takes courage not to be discouraged and start the culling process of exclusion and move ahead.

These specific people did not leave Zanu PF on the grounds of principle — such as being disgusted with Zanu PF-driven corruption — but were sore losers in a power struggle, resulting in them being kicked out and, to boot it all, completely losing access to State resources, which are there for the taking as long as you dutifully express undying loyalty to, for instance, Dr Amai Grace Mugabe. Being on the right side of the First Family is the surest meal ticket in Zimbabwe because power has become so personalised. That is why political time-servers such as Mutasa are slinking back to Mugabe specifically to recover that lost meal ticket.

The one thing and the most the genuine opposition can promise is not a free meal ticket, but the opportunity to change the system to make people earn well unlike in present-day Zimbabwe where honest work earns you poverty. The overwhelming number of university graduates in the country will tell you that hell is paradise compared to their hopeless job prospects. What’s needed are people with heart, dedication and the will to sacrifice, not just a bunch of disgruntled losers who are accustomed to using the Zanu PF-captured State as just a meal ticket. So we should say to Mutasa: “Thanks for going!” because chancers like him are as loyal as their next meal.

The next category of people not to be indulged anymore are those serial whingers operating on the sidelines — mostly on the Internet — who constantly and feverishly tear apart the efforts of others. These people take themselves too seriously to the extent that they do not even realise that they are indeed a bunch of whining, over-opinionated do-nothings with no personal accountability or political standing or authority to talk about. They tend to form their opinions based on regurgitating others’ words, most often provided by the media or other sideliners, allowing them to feel like they are part of the action, when, in reality, they are least so. In the figment of their own imaginations, they see themselves as God’s greatest intellectual gifts to mankind. Of course, it’s not a crime to have such delusions of grandeur. And it’s also not a crime to advise people not to take them seriously. But these unhinged characters take great offence when you serve them the same dish of harsh criticism. A mature, balanced person knows that criticism is a two-way street, not one-way, but not these clowns in a political circus.

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Then we have people who have been all over the place — the Samuel Sipepa Nkomo types. Once upon a time Sipepa Nkomo was a member of the original MDC under Morgan Tsvangirai. Following the split in 2005, he went with Welshman Ncube’s MDC formation. But in no time at all he was back in Tsvangirai’s MDC-T bigger tent. Some years down the line, he again ditched Tsvangirai to go along with Tendai Biti to form the People’s Democratic Party. And — hold your breath — he abandoned Biti sooner rather than later. Like the bridegroom who runs away with the best man, the former PDP deputy president crossed over to Joice Mujuru’s National People’s Party after being sent by his party to negotiate for a pact between the two parties. Going by that, it would not be out of character to see him retrace his way back into PF Zapu, now swallowed by Zanu PF. Watch this space to see if the serial political defector will not live up to his tag.

Going by Sipepa Nkomo’s track record, it’s only a matter of time before he ditches Mujuru. Indeed, his record as a political wanderer is not under any immediate threat. Such is his peripatetic nature. Mujuru can only humour him at her own risk. She should not cry that she was not warned.

Now that Mujuru is in coalition talks with other opposition parties, Sipepa Nkomo finds himself face-to-face with Tsvangirai, Ncube and Biti after burning bridges with them, calling them all sorts of names in his parting shots. For one supposed to be an old hand in politics, a person who has had long experience in the game, he speaks too soon. It is not a coincidence that he is rabidly against Tsvangirai leading the planned coalition. It is not coincidental that he is now fighting in Mujuru’s corner more vociferously than anyone else in her camp as if he has been her lifelong supporter. His anti-Tsvangirai stance looks decidedly motivated by saving face, but should the coalition be sacrificed on that? And really, does he still have any face to save? And most inexcusably and unforgivably, he is sowing even more confusion in an already difficult situation.

It’s for the opposition — the genuine opposition — to call time on political chancers, clowns and confusionists.

Conway Nkumbuzo Tutani is a Harare-based columnist. Email: [email protected]