Wife-swapping infiltrates church

THE pull of forbidden pleasures has always been known to be strong, particularly in circles where taboos hold no sway, but some Zimbabwean couples have taken it a notch higher through a new practice of wife-swapping.

BY staff reporter

There is no need to go to Hollywood or to purchase porn movies that sell at $1 for two in Harare’s streets or anywhere else in the cities, for one to watch some weird sex orgies; where one can live out their fantasies with a friend’s wife or husband after a “gentlemen’s agreement”.

Although there are no strings attached, those involved in the swinging lifestyle claim that it helps strengthen bonds of friendship.

As part of the practice, groups of married couples exchange sexual partners on a casual basis, commonly known as wife-swapping or “swinging”, which can, at times, include group sex or such orgies.

In one case, two couples from a Harare church decided to do a swap, but after some time, one of the men decided he wanted his friend’s wife for keeps, and that led to the breakdown of relations between the two families.

“This was not meant to be a permanent arrangement, but then my husband and my friend decided they wanted to stay together for good, but I was not happy,” confided the woman, who lost her husband to her friend in a swap deal that went awry.

Ladies of the night mill outside a night club in Bulawayo central business district on Sunday night.

Another couple confided to NewsDay that when a church pastor (name supplied) was seconded to their assembly, he gave a sermon about adultery, but almost the whole assembly was upset such that they warned him to stop interfering in their private lives.

“The assembly warned the pastor that what they practised was not adultery as it was consensual between married couples. We also told him to mind his business lest he was jettisoned from the assembly. He changed the theme after that chastisement,” the woman said.

The woman’s friend, who is also involved, chipped in: “We practice swinging simply for variety, but it can be for days, a week or a month, or occasionally whenever we feel like it. We had a couple that we invited for dinner, and when the husband was asked by another man if he could caress his wife, he got confused. After the guy explained the practice, that couple decided to walk out.”

In some cases, several women can indulge in sex with one male partner, while others cheer them on.

A participant in the orgies, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, described how it works.

“We can call for a party with a minimum of five couples. Although the majority of us are married, some may choose to bring along their girlfriends. We will be relaxed, having drinks,” another source said.

“What we do, however, is not motivated by beer. We love what we do. We will be semi-naked during the party and free to do anything, from kissing to caressing in full view of others. There is no jealousy at all. After the party is finished, everyone goes home.”

He attributed the new trend to modernity and the encroaching of cosmopolitan cultures into Zimbabwe with people who have had stints in the Diaspora spearheading the practice.

He said using protection during the orgies was optional as there is “absolute trust” among the couples involved.

Some people who spoke to NewsDay in separate interviews, however, said such orgies spoke to the increasing moral decadence in the country.

“Honestly, that is alien to our culture as Zimbabweans, where we have high respect for the institution of marriage or relationships. I cannot believe that we have sunk to such levels. I’m sure this is influenced by heavy consumption of pornographic material,” Itai Mukwize said.

In Western countries, the practice of swapping partners is rife at private sex clubs, where it is believed to strengthen friendships.

In Africa, there are also cultures in which the practice is celebrated, particularly in Namibia, where wife-swapping among nomadic tribes is said to have been practiced for generations.

Marriage counsellor and NewsDay columnist Kilton Moyo said reports of wife-swapping in Zimbabwe were rather shocking.

“This is a shock. But well, people in the world can do anything as much as the prince of this world wants them to do. There is no wife-swapping in human life. As far as I know and understand, this is a doctrine of demons. It is influenced by sinful nature and must not be allowed in a normal society like ours,” Moyo said.

“Wife-swapping is abominable and cannot be allowed. It’s just happening to further confuse marriage.”

Harare provincial police spokesperson Simon Chazovachii said while no arrests had been made, the police had noted the trend with concern, particularly through social media networks.

“Close neighbours should make a report. We haven’t had a formal report except on social media. If a report is made, the police will be forced to attend and those people will be arrested right there,” Chazovachii said.

The practice seems to feed into a new culture that has also seen an increase in nude and pool parties, particularly among teenagers, where people end up engaging in indiscriminate sexual intercourse with whoever is available and willing.

Investigations by NewsDay also showed that there are several websites where locals wanting to engage in swinging could hook up with potential partners be they married, singles, bisexuals or gays.

According to one of the directories, Spicy Match, “looking for the perfect swingers in Zimbabwe is practically looking for a needle in a haystack” before providing a selection of swingers locally.

Another site, The Adult Hub, lists potential sex contacts and says it has clients in Harare, Mutare, Kwekwe, Chitungwiza and Marondera.

Some of the clients post their pictures although they use pseudonyms.

The Harare Swingers Club contact list also carries payoff lines such as “I’m good looking, outgoing, friendly, horny most of the time” and “I am a 30-year-old male who is adventurous and pleasure seeking. I am looking for a lady to go into ecstasy with”.

Sometime in 2014, a Florida couple, said to be devout Christians, claimed it was joyfully spreading the love of Christ and the Bible through their unconventional wife-swapping and fitness ministry.

Dean Parave (49) and his wife Cristy (44) were quoted saying they believed the community of fitness swingers they created and promoted on Facebook was “God’s plan”.

“I feel like right now this is God’s plan,” Cristy was quoted. “The Bible doesn’t talk about swinging, specifically. I just feel like, as a married couple, if you agree on something together, then it’s okay. If it’s not, like I said, judgment day, I’ll find that out.”

The Florida couple, who met at a bodybuilding competition, are interested in sharing their beliefs and their spouses with others who feel similarly.

They are said to have started their online network seven years ago.

The couple said their swinger lifestyle did not conflict with their Christian beliefs and they regarded it as a kind of ministry.

“So far today, God hasn’t told me, ‘Dean stop that, it’s a sin. I don’t want you to do that.’ Until He does that, I’m going to keep trying to help as many people as I can,” Parave was also quoted saying.

21 Responses to Wife-swapping infiltrates church

  1. Jamengweni Godonga January 16, 2016 at 6:14 am #

    Then you expect God to bless us with his rains; never! Sokonekele

    • BABA January 16, 2016 at 11:50 am #

      Call it instituitionalised prostitution. Ndokushereketa manje uku

  2. Godschild January 16, 2016 at 7:48 am #

    What is wrong with people? This is unheard of. The wrath of God is coming because of such acts. The Bible in 2 Tim 3:1-5 days that people shall be lovers of pleasure more tan of God. Bad bad bad!

  3. jovha January 16, 2016 at 8:13 am #

    maZimbo anongohakira pese pese se sine.

  4. Rangwani January 16, 2016 at 8:23 am #

    Sei Mazimbo muchihakira pazvinhu zviri wrong. Aya ndiwo mashura! Munotukisa nyika.

  5. Nyika yababa January 16, 2016 at 8:31 am #

    I think this article is mostly not true. If it is indeed happening, it is on a small scale. The article is devoid of facts except quotes of ‘anonymous’ people. The time they give ‘facts’ its for adult websites that have nothing to do with swapping wives/husbands. I am disappointed by this factless tabloid writing meant to just fill in pages and sell the paper. Surely Newsday can do better.

    • sky January 18, 2016 at 1:22 pm #

      taura hako , manyepo ega ega.ma source efake

  6. Godschild January 16, 2016 at 8:50 am #

    2 Timothy 3:1-5
    But mark this: There is will be terrible times int last days. People will be lovers out fhemselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobidient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, without self control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, LOVERS OF PLEASURE RATHER THAN LOVERS OF GOD- having a form of godliness but denying the power thereof. Have nothing to do with such people.

  7. nhari January 16, 2016 at 11:23 am #

    I think it’s time for The Lord to come back this is too much

    • roxannegriffin456 January 16, 2016 at 5:23 pm #

      what Randall replied I am amazed that some people can get paid $6308 in a few weeks on the internet

  8. Hang Jogi January 16, 2016 at 5:33 pm #

    Zimbabweans are famous for defecating in the open.
    They also unashamedly shag anywhere.
    They fornicate more than bunny rabbits.
    (Remember comfort madam Teurai Ropa, Millicent Mombeshora, Edith Kagoro, Gamuchirai Chinamasa, Naneti Silukhumi, Maria Zimba-Dube, Phumzile Mlambo-Ngcuka, and addicted shagger Morgan Tsvangirai.

  9. dannythomas4556 January 16, 2016 at 8:58 pm #


  10. trust chidede January 16, 2016 at 9:11 pm #

    Apostacy#Signs of the end time.

  11. GERALD January 17, 2016 at 12:24 am #


  12. ebson patsika January 17, 2016 at 6:20 am #

    Ring a bell? Wapusa wapusa.

  13. Betyes Rinonaka January 17, 2016 at 2:19 pm #

    NewsFiction at it again

  14. Cashington Jazi January 17, 2016 at 5:35 pm #

    Morgan Richard Tsvangirai has recently become an active member.

  15. Realist January 17, 2016 at 9:13 pm #

    They are worse than pigs and dogs, ey bob??

  16. Truth Matters January 18, 2016 at 7:33 am #

    This is what happens in the age where pastors preach that the Commandments are nailed to the cross.

  17. Jenandebvu Mukotami January 18, 2016 at 10:06 am #

    This article is baseless and aimed at tarnishing our already battered image, Zimbabweans are struggling and have managed to survive against all odds, For some mischievous journalist to write such a lie is criminal. Apart from not mentioning any names or churches the writer’s onle credible references are american based internet porn stars.

    Surely some people are only alive because its illegal to shoot them. Tarnishing a whole country’ s image just because you cant sell a paper! Ha regai ana Chihuri vachisunga mhani.

  18. Dhara Dee January 18, 2016 at 10:48 am #

    There is nothing like that, this report is fiction. Why not name the church? Why use names that are not known? You also want to increase your readership by writing fiction. I think this reporter is watching too many movies..

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