I WAS part of a meeting last week that reflected on how women can maneuver in a male dominated space and it fascinated me.
It came against a backdrop of my exploration of getting support from a male leader who dealt with me heavy-handedly. In both spaces, I was left questioning my emotional intelligence and felt rather awkward, hurt and somewhat upset with a dash of yearning for a more transformational way of leading.
It got me thinking of how leaders harness their energy and what sort of energy is present for leaders to work with. In the end, I broke down the energies into two distinct types – the masculine and the feminine energy.
Depending on which one a leader is in tune with at any given time, that one will dominate and show up in many ways than one.
This also determines how one embraces his or her subordinate’s and gives them support as they work together. Moreover, it does have an influence on how progress is made.
Reality of leadership energy types
For decades on end, women have almost always had to be invited into spaces and make do with whatever systems are present as they do what needs to be done.
Most of the times these spaces are dominated by older, male, chauvinist, exclusionary leaders who are bent on making sure that whatever they want to see happen goes ahead.
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Most of the times, their methods are ruthless to whomever they seek to eliminate or “deal” with hence the leadership situations are synonymous with the dog-eat-dog jargon.
Name-calling, malice, personality assassination, information preservation and manipulation so as to have power and control, holding onto power and a failure to hand over the mantle, unorthodox ways of being, disregard of emotional status of those being led plus a myriad of sad realities define this type of leadership.
I would like to define this sort of leadership as a masculine energy sort of relationship.
The leaders who employ this sort of leadership have a huge disregard for the need to share leadership as they know all and can bear all for those they lead.
Moreover, the inability to read into the lived realities of those they lead is an advantage to them as they see no evil and hear no evil so everything is well and moving just fine (it could be #sofarsogood or zvirikufaya depending on where you sit) and what else would those being led want? Fear, disillusionment, resignation are some of the typical symptoms amongst the led with such a type of leadership.
Both women and men are found using this type of masculine energy but mostly men are the biggest fans of this sort.
The feminine energy can also be part of the above traits but with definitely a more toned down version of the traits or worse in some instances as they feel the need to be “better” than their male counterpart!
When those that utilise their feminine energy type of leadership are not busy being in their head, they tend to be clear on what energy is being utilised and could alternate both energies. The truth is that feminine energy kind of leadership is fairly new to the block. After years of men leading using their masculine energy, it would seem like that is the only form of energy that the world has known. This is not true as women too have been leaders utilising both their feminine and masculine energy in many fronts including the home, family, community, church and even in the workplace.
However, the way women show up utilising their energy is often questioned, ridiculed, disregarded and sometimes totally dismissed. A closer look at a utilisation of both forms of energy in leadership will show that pretty much that is what being human is all about.
No one is born a certain way socially, it is learned behavior. The way one leads is a sum total of their socialisation and life experiences so anyone can utilise any form of energy as they lead. What stands out clearly is that few males are criticised for utilising whatever form of energy but when women lead their way it is deemed all sorts of stereotypes. I know a number of men who lead and their capacity is nothing when it comes to delivery but women are often dealt with harshly when they utilise their known form of leading.
Moreover, this so called glass ceiling is used as an excuse to keep the entrance shut for women and the very few that get access are often forced to utilise more the masculine energy than they would the feminine.
Leading the way one knows best how to
The masculine and feminine energy paradox is a new form of leadership in today’s world. There is no need to fear the stereotypes especially to the sisters. One can choose whatever leadership style they deem necessary.
What is critical is the execution of tasks with a team’s needs and diversity in mind. Women can lead in how the world deems “way to go” but what is critical is that women utilise their own ways of knowing, so if a woman leader utilises her masculine energy as a leader let her be and when she is in touch with her masculine side as is sometimes is a reality, let her be. The same applies to men.
There is no need to be too busy being macho to utilise one’s feminine energy even when stereotyping as gay may be thrust on a brother. At the end of the day what is critical is that a leader is human, integral and true to themselves and the leadership at hand.
l Grace Chirenje is a citizen of the world and writes in her personal capacity as one who lives life to the full. She would be excited to hear from you. You can contact Grace on [email protected], follow her on Twitter @graceruvimbo or like her Facebook page: Grace Ruvimbo Chirenje.
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