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Amazing Adelaide (Part 2)

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ADELAIDE, the capital of South Australia, reminded me — at Christmas 2012 — inexorably of Bulawayo in the mid-1970s!

ADELAIDE, the capital of South Australia, reminded me — at Christmas 2012 — inexorably of Bulawayo in the mid-1970s!

Opinion by Dusty Miller

Yes, I’ve been accused before of living in the past and I admit it . . . it’s much cheaper!

I mean Adelaide was breathtakingly clean: not a single scrap of rubbish, cigarette butt, bus ticket, ATM slip or banana skin to be seen anywhere. And everything worked: electricity, water, gas etc; no pot-holes; the robots were in operation and synchronised sensibly to cope with different traffic flows at disparate times of the day.

I saw no beggars, pan-handlers, pimps, prostitutes, druggies, obvious muggers or dangerous lunatics on the grid-iron planned tree-shaded streets, in many of which it would be possible for a waggon and team of oxen to do a U-turn . . . not that the early South Australians had such transport.

People drive mainly brand new cars with faultless courtesy and consideration. Public transport is stop-watch split-second reliable and affordable. Essential when there’s zero tolerance to driving after drink by a state police force which appeared singularly humourless.

Much of the spectacular colonial-style architecture dating from the mid-19th century is essentially intact. Sure, at street level you see the plate glass windows and logos of international chain stores, probably the same as they’d appear in Amsterdam, Abu Dhabi, Auckland, Aberdeen, Aachen or Ajaccio, but step back a few paces and upper storeys and roofs are straight off the drawing boards of Victorian, and Edwardian architects or those of the days of George V.

The vandalism that has seen many southern African architectural gems ripped down and demolished in the name of so-called “progress” wasn’t allowed to befall South Australia. There the venerable buildings are protected.

Victorian arcades Modern malls flourish, but so too do wonderful Victorian arcades of long-established family businesses.

In one such Aladdin’s cave I saw the original store of Haigh’s chocolates with its décor unchanged since it opened in 1915; across the road a shop exclusively sells theatrical and cosmetic wigs and two doors up another stocks nothing but top-of-the range fountain pens, inks, writing paper, journals and diaries.

We shopped on my first full day in Adelaide’s Central Market, a throbbing, vibrant tourist attraction where meat, fruit, vegetables, poultry, fish, toys, luggage and travel goods are sold. We drank wonderful chilled milk-shakes in a shady café but I was horrified at the cost of some goods.

Australia grows excellent fruit from one corner of the vast country to the opposite, yet limes (I like a slice of one in a gin-and-tonic) were A$2,25 (nearly US$2,50 each!) A kilo of bananas — granted the biggest I’ve seen in my life — were A$5. (Here they’re US$1 for 10 . . . sometimes 12 if it’s a hot day, late afternoon and they’re beginning to look a bit manky!)

I’d been warned to wear spotless footwear (so as not to inadvertently bring in suspect African weed seed, mud or foot-and-mouth disease!) when presenting myself at immigration at Adelaide Airport, so had worn brand new veldtskoen after Dubai. These cost US$25 at Bata Borrowdale. An almost identical pair of Australian footwear labelled “Desert Sand Boots” was priced A$100 (about US$106).

I bought trainers on special in a sale at a Rivers Store for A$39,95 (about US$43,20) but they’re better made and more comfortable than the ones I wear from Marks & Spencer’s in UK at £25 (about US$37,50).

Australian shoes come with spare laces. Big tick for that! I’ve occasionally bought three bottle of Barossa Valley or McLaren Vale wine (a red, white and rosé) in my daughter’s local supermarket in Oxfordshire—admittedly “on special” at just £10 (about US$15). But in those eponymous lush valleys — half an hour’s drive from Adelaide CBD — you won’t find any bottle at the farm gate priced at under A$16 each!

Brilliant beef You can easily pay A$36 for a brilliant, big beef steak, but it will often come without chips or any starch, veggies, bread or salad.

(Dearest steak at DV8 in Kamfinsa is US$22 with everything!) The cheapest beer I found in Australia was around A$2 . . . but only if buying a 24 carton from a bottle store. In six-packs, they cost around A$3 each and in a pub, club, café, restaurant or hotel, you’re looking at anything between A$7,50 and A$14 for one. (And this in a country experiencing its most telling heat wave since 1939, where a drinking man, such as me, can thirstily sink a few “stubbies” anytime!) A bottle of Johnny Walker Red Label is A$45 and Grey Goose Vodka (possibly the world’s best) A$65.

Admission to the still being refurbed Adelaide Oval for a floodlit T20 game was A$20, without a confirmed seat (and we couldn’t find one!)

Don’t go there if a nicotine addict, there’s no smoking within or immediately outside the 53 500-seater stadium. (Even during a five-day Test Match!)

Two reasons are given for high costs (by global standards): the strength of the Aussie dollar against the Greenback (it’s increased in value by more than 60% in 10 years, I heard) and secondly what Australians pay themselves.

Complaining about the cost of Adelaide Hills wine, the friendly grower told me his 22-year-old son was on A$125 000 a year in mining, paid little tax and next to nothing in rates. Take home pay was almost all disposable and he looks forward to disposing of it!

Regardless of their high standard of living and grand quality of life, the Australian cost of living made our Zimbabwean salaries (if we’re lucky enough to earn one) look very, very sick!

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