HomeOpinion & AnalysisColumnistsDear Godfrey Majonga, please make love not war!

Dear Godfrey Majonga, please make love not war!

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I seldom write to “inconsequential” people, preferring to expend my literary energy on chiding entrenched dictatorship.

But since the acoustics of February generally reverberates with love, it’s only ideal to remind you that picking a fight with journalists is discordantly off Valentine rhythm.

Besides, why stem the overflow of testosterone incited by millions of red roses that flood homes, offices and restaurants by inoculating us with Zanu PF DNA of enforced political celibacy?

Mr Majonga, foreign newspapers are not as diabolic as you portray. Being an accomplished journalist yourself, we expect that a progressive Zimbabwe Media Commission chairman bends over backwards to protect any news publication.

You know as well as I do that access to information is a constitutional right, thus instead of stressing yourself over Business Day, Mail&Guardian, Sunday Times, The Star and Financial Mail, think only about love this Valentine Month!

Oh by the way, Godfrey, aren’t we all products of parental love? I guess the “god” bit in your name was a prophetic gesture to remind your folks that God — who is love — had answered their prayers. I can understand if your colleague Tafataona derives maximum pleasure from persecuting newspaper publishers and journalists. Like I said last week, some children outgun their names!

I need not remind you, Mr Majonga, how the Access to Information and Protection of Privacy Act is in direct conflict with Article 19 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. “Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression including the right to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media regardless of frontier.”

Are there no better ways of endearing yourself with Zanu PF than rattling sabres at foreign newspapers?

Remember, one day the very journalists and publishers you and Dr Tafataona love so much to pummel will be ministers and permanent secretaries in the next MDC government.

Imagine what “retributive justice” they will inflict on you! But like I say, this week is “love month”, so take a cruise in the Love Boat and toss the spirit of vengeance overboard. Oh, let me remind you about this Valentine thing, if that can help exorcise the ire that pervades chairpersons of statutory media bodies.

Greek mythology has it that the son of Venus was a god of love — Cupid — a mischievous boy who loved to shoot match-making arrows at prospective couples.

But one day he himself fell in love (with Psyche) and they made love to produce a child called Pleasure. I’m not so sure where the bizarre modern-day red rose thing came from.

I guess some creative-now-destitute “white commercial farmer” figured out an ingenious way to dispose of his excess stock.

So bwana Godfrey, just like Cupid, why not blow regulatory kisses at journalists this February for pleasurable information results instead of reinforcing Zanu’s PF fallacious anti-foreign newspaper crude reasoning!

Convert your hatred for foreign newspapers into love for information and who knows, local female journos may succumb to that famous “ZTV-smile” and inundate your Danhiko office with red roses. Toxifying Valentine Month is so unCupid-like.

Don’t be like Tshaka Zulu who “rejoiced” at piercing man’s hearts with short-stabbing spears. Look at where he ended up — in the annals of murderous African dictators!

Like the hippies of the flower power of the ’60s, Godfrey, I urge you to live up to your name and make love not war this February. After all, God is Love!

Sincerely yours, Rejoice.

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